Yup, this will be my last post about stepping down, it has been 2 days and so far only my closest friends have said anything, a pool of people smaller in numbers than one hand of fingers.
Yes I am being very self centered, and perhaps idealistic, in hoping that my guild mates would say something, anything to show their support or dissent at the decision.
This leads me to be torn as to the motives behind the lack of chatter, and as I have been reminded so vehemently the last couple of days “ASS / U / ME” is the mother of all cock ups. So I am not even going to go into my theories suffice it to say I am feeling lost in the guild as though I should not be there.
I don’t know where I stand with anyone in the guild now and I think that scares me more than anything else. The last three years I have spent knowing my place and knowing where I fit in, now I am not sure if I am even supposed to be stay in the guild after the way it all went down?
Do guild leaders stay in the guild they step down from if they do it for negative reasons and not just getting too busy in real life reasons? Have others felt this sense of dismemberment from the people?
I am too scared to message people, as I don’t know who are the ones who dislike me, I have had no one actually talk to me since Sunday, and so I am not sure what to do, i didn’t really speak on vents last night or in raid very much as I had no idea what to say. I am second guessing everything about me even being there, do people even give a crap if I am there or not? Would they prefer I wasn’t? Do they have me on mute on vents – which would explain why people sometimes never answer me?
Yeah, defiantely time to let it go. I won’t be posting about this again as there is now nothing to say, i will see how things go once everything has settled down. Maybe I am just being ultra paranoid – or maybe I am right on the money, either way a few weeks from now I will have a better idea…I hope.